BUDDHA GARDEN JUNE 29

Last night this was my yoga. It involved planting, digging, visualizing, pruning, weeding, and mulching. The rest of the night was quiet for me. I spent about an hour out there. As I said, didn't feel like talking a lot.

I am going to a silent retreat in Esalen in November so am practicing being still and quiet as much as I can. Even just SITTING a few minutes extra here and there during the day is very beneficial. It is the only method I know of for reducing anxiety. Much better than drinking, smoking, drinking, caffeine, etc.

This week in my classes I will explore blocks in many different ways. I am looking forward to this. I came up with some really fun ideas that will take you out of the box.

Had a great phsyical practice this 5 am. Lots of inversions, lots of core, and lots of dolphins so those will be included in classes too.

PHLOX IN A BOX

My evening meditation will be on these phlox and evening primroses going in the Buddha garden. I will post the results tomorrow. There is a huge gap in the garden from my last planting which became rabbit food quickly. Must have been a clover relative, because the rabbit keeps going back and looking for new growth and nibbling whatever is there down to nothing. You are welcome bunnies for the 30$ snacks. It was a really cool flower too and looked great but I think these are really pretty.

The garden is getting a little overgrown so might also be time for some pruning so it doesn't get too crazy back there.

I was reading an interview with Duncan Wong and he expressed getting back to nature is what it is all about for the yogis and I agree. As I have stated, I keep manifesting the country life with a small at home studio but mentioned that to the hubby or building one off our current house and it is a no go for him. Sigh. He told me to rent space but then it goes all commercial and I have to hire people etc. I want a place where students can come and drop a donation into a jar and get a great two hour class with myself or guest/group teaching.

One thing I think would be great about that is as a teacher I can move out of what I might feel I am EXPECTED to do, according to someone else's marketing etc, into more of a intuitional free form type of class. I like the idea of a longer class, more pranayama, less distractions. I have eyed two or three perfect properties outside of my town for this venture so if they come up for sale, then I will have to reapproach it. I picture long windows and Buddha gardens.

Back tomorrow with updated Buddha garden pics.

YOGA OF TANTRA

Going to visit this studio in Chicago next week. I love studio pictures becauise I am manifesting a home studio in my intention. Love these floors. Picturing more windows overlooking gardens though.

My studio I am manifesting would be at home, not in a commerical area. I would have a smaller one just for my own practice, privates, workshops, and two classes a week for intermediate/advanced students at a per student rate.

On a small farm, which husband is saying big NO to. Still I manifest.

What does that have to do with tantra. I am revisiting tantra and doing some svadhyaya on the subject. I studied yoga therapy with some tantra people and tantra is about manifesting yoga on your life. The studio I am visiting has teachers who work in that tradition so I am interested in how they convey that to their students.

I am a teacher and student interested in the classic forms of yoga am trying to figure out to MANIFEST it in my classes. Westernized yoga is obviously very athletically based right now. Amazing teachers and students are learning amazing asana skills, but I want to work on revolving it back into what yoga is about. Knowledge of the SELF and integration into the cosmic whole. Daunting I know.

Yoga to me is pretty much everywhere though and different things to different people. Ohm to my husband is on his Harley and I totally get it when I am biking on my Trek. There is a dissolution of outward and inward distractions and coming into the present is easier when I am, for example, working my desk job. No ohm quality there, except looking out a window. Sigh. See below political post.

But the best is just stillness too. Meditation is so hard but the tantric meditation is the best for me. I like the rhythym of mantra like my feet turning the pedals of a bike.

HIP ROTATORS

Pose of the week. I think I have worked on this before. I love this pose. There are many many phases of working into it.

I think I am attracted to this being a hip rotator struggler. While I have many students who ease comfortably into padmasana, this is practice of patience. I have to say after many years, it is better. Now my hamstrings go on forever and that is also an advantage to this pose, but like I tell my students, if you can do bakasana you can learn most depending on your level of flexibility and willingness.

Why do I set myself up for reaching high? I have always been a challenge person. I always go for the hardest challenge. You can read my Ana Forrest post earlier. When I did that advanced training at Kripalu I am pretty sure it was the hardest one there. I have no doubt about that. Even though I went there falling far short of what the other students could do, it is almost a year later. I am pretty sure I wouldn't be doing what I am doing now if I hadn't gone there.

So I set the bar high and inch towards achieving my goal. That is how I roll.

I am going to Chicago over the 4th for a U2 concert and everyone knows I LOVE visiting Chicago studios. I usually try to hit something over at Moksha but this time I am in the far South Loop and am going to Tejas. I needed a class the morning of the 5th and they have a high level one and the studio is right around the corner! So I can walk there and don't have to get the car out of the parking lot. I will be pretty excited to go and I know the class will challenge me. I think I will start doing studio reviews of my travels.

So big hip rotator week here we come.

I DON'T NEED A PROP!!

I see a lot of students who stubbornly refuse to use props. In one studio I teach at, there was a point where we had no props, teaching only Bikram style yoga at the time and Bikram does not believe in props.

Some of that residual resistance is still there but I try to reinforce that props are used twofold:

To enhance the pose
To allow the pose

When a pose is enhanced it gets bigger. The body is allowed to open. In this respect, it allows the body to go into a deeper practice.

When it allows a pose, it is a support. If you can't pick up your foot when you stand up, maybe a strap can help.

I love working with teachers who use a lot of props, like Ana Forrest and Tias Little. My own home practice is HEAVILY reinforced with blocks of various sizes, like my renowned jumbo blocks and sometimes two straps to support advanced back bends. I also use two ottomans, various chairs, walls, and a husband.

I have never taken an Iyengar class but plan on it soon. I love the influence he had on restorative and I also have plenty of bolsters and blankets and eye pillows for at home restorative. What could be a better home practice after a long hard week working and teaching.

I am still working on some themes for classes this week and will post something by tomorrow. So get your props and come on down this week for a very enhanced practice.

YOGA FOG

Yesterday I posted about Yoga Nidra which is fitting for me. I have been experiencing a lot of yoga nidra lately. My dream world has intertwined and wound into and surfaced in my reality.

When I trained with Dr. Richard Miller, he guided us through 6 yoga nidras. One was particularly intense for all of the trainees. It was on a Thursday afternoon. I can't explain it. It was like I was asleep but wasn't. I was in the room, but I was somewhere else. There were other people around. Conversations going on.

All of us had similar intense experiences. I have seen that happen to students in yoga classes, especially deep Yin classes. They come out and tell about their experience and it is way beyond about stretching. They are just experiencing deeper levels of conscousness. Yoga nidra can and does happen spontaneously.

Last night I had an odd dream experience and when I woke I was still in it. It is foggy today which is fitting. It is as though the fog won't lift. I just taught a class in that state too so not sure what it was like or if I was able to tune that in to my class. I hope so, because I think that would be very authentic teaching. Either that or they hated that loooonnnnggg balance series.

On the way into town to teach I kept going over and over in my head the words to "A Day In The Life" by the Beatles:

Woke up, fell out of bed
Dragged a comb across my head
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup
And looking up, I noticed I was late
Found my coat and grabbed my hat
Made the bus in seconds flat
Found my way upstairs and had a smoke
And somebody spoke and I went into a dream
AH

I love that song because the Beatles were exploring levels of consciousness and they put it into so many songs and this one is timeless and I related to it today. It is about the normality of our life and how we have obligations to our life and society. Waking up is rude and abrupt and then we go on our way through our day. But in the middle of it all something can trigger us into a different place. We are all running against time on a day to day basis. Every day can be so much the same but so differeent. The dream world is an escape and we all have ways of escaping, possibly through addictions or numbing out.

Sometimes I have felt as though yoga is an addiction for me and it is. As an 'addict' in my own sense, I need transference. Addictions never die. They can only be transferred to something else. It is just a different level of exploring new levels of consciousness that we are seeking through addiction.

I will be theming more on this and relating it to the blog as I move forward.

YOGA NIDRA

Yoga Nidra means yoga sleep. It is one of the early Hatha yoga practices and allows one to go from a restful savasana place into deeper levels of consciousness. It is a state of conscious sleep where the body rests, but the mind is awake.

An experienced guide takes you into a deep restful state of pratyahara. Although many first time practitioners will fall asleep easily after reaching a state where the body is totally relaxed, the goal is to guide you into that state while allowing yo to be present and aware of what is going on. As many external distractions as possible should be removed.

At the beginning of the session , the practitioner is asked to set a sankalpa, or a resolve. This can help you to reshape your personality as the resolve is repeated and is absorbed by the subconscious. During the deeper states, samskaras, or old impressions from our past or past lives, arise and we are able to acknowledge them since we are in a state of awareness.

Some people will achieve dream like states as the subconscious arises and they will have experiences and insights that they may not understand. It is a good idea to take notes on this after the session to reflect on later.

These images could be universal archetypes that are so deep we would never be aware of them in most states of consciousness or semi-consciousness. Carl Jung recognized the universal consciousness and his work on archetypes, along with his own experience, has helped to solidify this practice as a valid form of therapy.

I learned Yoga Nidra from Dr. Richard Miller, a yoga and psychotherapist. He brought me into some very intense levels of awareness as well as the other people in my program. He has used his methods to help the homeless, people with depression and people with PTSD.

Transformation happens when we approach these impressions and realize they are manifested in every level of our being. Removing them is difficult, but acknowledging they rest in our psyche, spirit, and body and waking up into being present can allow us to start to move forward out of our traumas, illnesses, disappointments, and anxiety.

Yoga asana is a profound experience because we are exploring them on such a physical basis. And as we explore the feeling body, we experience our former impressions even if we can't associate them such as: my hips are tight because I didn't get enough love as a child. It isn't important to label. As we approach the practice of pratyahara, we learn that we don't remove sensory impressions but we try to stop reacting to them.

So continue to explore new avenues of yoga. There is so much out there and so much more every day. I love the classic system of yoga, but even Dharma Mittra explains yoga as a practice that is transforming itself every day. It is great we can take a practice like Yoga Nidra and use it to help people now.

POLITICS

I won't get political again but I am a state employee in Wisconsin and what this governor and the GOP has done to this state has been devastating to so many of us. Besides being a yoga teacher I am a CPA and have worked for the State of Wisconsin for almost 18 years. For the Governor or anyone to call me a 'have' is disturbing. Most people in my profession make way more money. As it is I probably will retire, if I do, with the state not making much more than I do right now, if not less. I feel they have dimished what I worked so hard for in my education and career.

Shame.

Thank goodness I work as a yoga teacher and work for the best two studios in Madison. I am so lucky to work with all the amazing students I do. I LOVE all of you and I love http://www.blissflowyoga.com/ and http://www.innerfireyoga.com/ .

I am lucky. If I had to rely on my career for any self fulfillment, it wouldn't be there. The people of Wisconsin should have known better and paid attention before the election, not after. Do you EVER hear this people even pretend they are looking out for our best in our jobs, for our children, for our state, for the good of anything. When they say they want to create jobs, they are saying pad the pockets of the few at the expense of our livelihoods, our kids education, our environment, etc.

People LISTEN next time.

It is good to see the grass roots movement though. The good of this is that people are involved and are watching every move they make. GO WISCONSIN!

YOGAGODDESS

Mariel Hemingway is the ultimate Yogagoddess. She represents yoga well as providing an example of finding health and balance. As much as I love beautiful yoga asana, incorporating it into your every moment of every day of your life is what it is about. The calmness you find in breathing into your body can be a metaphor for the meditation of life.

For me, the moving my practice off the mat has meant using the skill of breath and mindfulness into gardening, dancing, cooking, and biking.

My mind was very jittery yesterday for example. I had an early morning at home practice and then a busy day. When it was all over, I couldn't wait to jump on my bike and start riding out into the country roads and absorb the beauty around me. There are new flowers out, birds and bugs, and the gentle breeze was like pranayama moving through everything, uniting all into one.

Mariel starts her day with meditation. Five or ten minutes can really take you into the present. Sitting and stillness are the hardest yoga practices, but taking it one breath and moment at a time and then moving into some asana can help you make your practice go on and on all day long, no matter what you are doing.

ONE ASANA AT A TIME

Whoever took these images (whoever I stole these images from) did a remarkable job of showing Duncan Wong, moving masterfully from one pose to another. If you were to see the flow, no doubt, most people would be daunted by trying the series. These pics, however, break this 'flow' down into manageable poses. You could work on these one at a time before considering combining them.

Let's break it down. The first is a seated position. We can all do that right? Then place the hands on the floor. Done. Inhale deep, exhale, lift hips using mula and uddiyana. (I like to use blocks to lift my hips higher.) Then strengthen the legs and left one heel at a time off the floor.

The second pose is lolasana. From the first position, bend knees and cross ankles. Doable. Hands to floor. Okay. Then use same method to lift hips highter and then feet.

Third pose could be working from bakasana to move to chataranga.

Fourth is cool, could be left out. (Or practice padmasana seated, then in shoulderstand, to headstand, to forearm balance, to handstand.)

Fifth is handstand. Work against the wall from downdog to begin.

I have always wanted to work with Master Wong. Each of these asanas separately are in PERFECT form. Look at the hand placement. Shoulders in front of wrists in handstand. It is all in the detail. You can learn a lot from a picture.

The yoga lesson is that each pose, no matter how hard, can be broken down, modified, etc into some form that is doable for each student individually. The process is the beauty of the practice. Each layer opens into another one.

See you at http://www.blissflowyoga.com/ and http://www.innerfireyoga.com/ this week and we can work on our layering.

BUDDHA GARDEN

I posted this on Facebook and got a lot of comments and likes. This is a big new Buddha we found this weekend for my Buddha perennial garden. I have been working on this garden for four years. The first year I dug all the sod up myself. My husband, of course, was very concerned that I didn't line it etc, but that isn't how I operate. This is really a small part of the current garden. There are two other smaller Buddhas and my plan was to add one a year. Actually just week I told my husband I wanted to find one still for this year and we went to my favorite jewelry store:

http://www.artgeckoshop.com/

And there he was. We parked in back and they have a gardener there who has this amazing perennial garden, but behind the store he has a new gated Zen garden full of imported Buddha statues. We happened to park there, didn't know it was there and low and behold there was my new statue! I knew right away this was mine.

So we put him out there Saturday and took this picture. I have more pics on Facebook of the Buddha garden but I think I will start posting weekly updates here. Yesterday I was out weeding it, putting in a new perennial I found, and mulching and I found I was really into the meditative quality that gardening offers. So I decided to make this garden my summer meditation practice, or part of it.

This garden has gone through a lot. Last year the weeds took over when we had a long hot summer spell and I was doing a lot of indoor canning and just could not bring myself to go out and weed. I have planted a lot of neat perennials that didn't work out. I am not sure if they died, or I weeded them out. It is often hard to tell the difference between weeds and perennials. Right now there is a patch in the back I am not sure about so I am watching it. I know I planted something there last year but not sure if this will flower into something gorgeous late summer or early fall or if it is just a big weed.

I know. I know. My husband told me to map out what I plant and I mean to but am still just going with my intuition for now. At this point, it looks great. Nothing is overgrown yet and the weeds are managable. That could change. As with any meditation practice, there are good times and weedy times where the thoughts overtake our calmness and anxiety sets in.

For now it is looking good and I love this Buddha.

MAD LOVE

So madly in love right now with life, my husband, yoga, gardening, living in the present not wasting one moment on regret or doubt or hopelessness, anger or bitterness.

MY FIRST TEACHERS

My first practice was entirely home practice. On VHS. DVDs were not around and there were very few classes in my town. That is Bryan Kest in the first pic instructing Sean Corn as a young student. I have worked with both in real workshops. Probably never would have thought it when I stumbled through the Kest tapes. The very first one I had though was the Ali McGraw tape with Eric Schiffman as the teacher. He has an awesome voice and it was filmed in that white sand and blue sky scene. All the students wore white and floated through the practice.

I never thought back then I could do what these people were doing in the tapes. I thought I had started late in life, but because I was consistent, finally moved into a studio and then through many teacher trainings, my practice improved and what I can do now surpasses what I thought was possible.

It is beautiful to see people in their youth practice, but there is a richness and focus in my older students that is astounding. They really appreciate what their bodies and minds are capable of and seem to want to soak in as much as they can and to learn as much as they can.

When we are young we have all the time in the world to breeze through our practice or whatever our dharma is but as we get older, we realize there is more we can do than we can't do. People who think otherwise are half dead.

When I worked with Ana Forrest last year I remember her saying that she too wondered if she would be able to do less with age, but she said she is still experiencing strength and agility through her diligent practice. I needed to hear that. I doubted it in myself somewhat at the time, but less than a year later, I am much stronger, focused, and healthy.

As Bob Dylan says, may you stay forever young.

YOGA ATTENTION WHORES

My thoughts are provoked on the marketing of the yoga teacher. I work for two studios. One studio expects me to be VERY aggressive on marketing my classes and tweeting my daily theme and Facebooking studio sales etc. I don't mind this but to be honest when I open Facebook and I see teachers constantly marketing their goods I do feel it is a bit self-aggrandizing. But social networking is what it is all about and I do find a lot of good ideas for future theming/workshops etc. One issue I have with it is the consumption of time and it seems to lack in humility, which I value spiritually. So this is what I came down to in order to make everyone, including myself comfortable.

I will market the studios sales, specials, goods, and events.

I will post ads about upcoming workshops that I (or fellow teachers) are doing.

I will not put a daily theme and ad up. I am sorry. If you like my class, you are already coming. If I don't get 60 people in class that is fine. Word of mouth works well and my class is not for everyone.

If I do have a special theme for class for the week, I will FB or tweet and now blog it, but that will not be a daily/weekly theme.

I finally decided I have to do what it comfortable for myself. I also have gotten burned a bit. I have had other teachers locally come to my classes and then put it out on social networking the next week as their theme/intention etc. I guess it is flattering, but again, I am not comfortable with it.

Another problem I have is that I might theme a hip opener class and then walk in the studio and am not feeling it for this particular group. I have learned to trust my intuition A LOT on this. I like to write out sequencing but have had to throw it out if I feel the class energetically or physically need something else that day. Sometimes I don't get that until I get into class and then it is fly by the seat of my pantsasana out of necessity.

Today is such a day people. You get what you get.

TO PLAYLIST OR NOT

I am a very busy person. I work a full time job, which I hope to do less of REAL SOON. I teach eight classes of yoga a week, which I hope to a little more of REAL SOON. I am also director of teacher training at Inner Fire Yoga Center and we are about to start our first session REAL SOON. I also take care of my home, have a large vegetable garden, I bike, and ballroom dance.

My yoga practice is first and foremost and I don't consider it a hobby. It is like eating or sleeping. My practice is all home practice. I just don't have time to go to the studio. Plus, my practice is so focused day to day on what I need, that I doubt going to a generic class would give me what I need. I also spend a lot of time researching online different sequencing and anything else I can find, like a new pose and how to work towards it, in order to give my students something new and fresh. My classes are NEVER the same and are continualy evolving.

I know a lot of teachers spend a lot of time on playlists. Yesterday I found a lot of info on various teachers who put their playlist up on a web site. That is useful for me, since I don't have time to spend before each class putting a new playlist together. I find there are also a lot of compilations already together that Iuse over and over. White Swan Records has a lot of good stuff.

To be honest though I find this a distraction for myself and although students love a good playlist, when I DO get to a class, I appreciate a teacher who has a little more to offer in the way of the actual class. There is no playlist and very little asana in classic yoga. I find myself getting rid of a lot of distractions in my own class that I bring and usually the feedback is good.

A few weeks ago my Ipod fritzed on me before class. It was right after I had been at a weekend workshop with Tias Little. I articulated the class much better and most of the students came back and said they liked it without the music. That seemed to be the answer I was looking for on this question and since then occasionally I just teach without it.

At home I usually practice with nothing, not my voice or anything else, but occasionally I will put some real cool music on and really enjoy what flows out of my body. A lot of times, it allows me to tap into the creative powers of my intuitive mind and I come up with some great sequencing. I like to write these down and they are usually very effective in the classroom.

But sometimes I just like to connect to the clarity of shhhhhh!!!!!

HEALING WITH ANA FORREST

I am in the middle of reading Ana Forrest's book FIERCE MEDICINE and am processing it slowly. I have not been able to sit through and read it front to back and am not sure the correct language now that I Kindle everything I read. At any rate, there are two reasons this resonates with me.

One. I did her Advanced Teacher Training at Kripalu last August. I can honestly say this is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life, especially physically. We did three and a half hour classes every day for nine days of advanced level asana. After the second day I wasn't sure if I was going to last. I am 54 years old and could not do a lot of the asana at that time. I stayed with it and at the end of the week, came out a stronger practitioner and had a lot of new skills/tools to bring to my classes. I can see the benefits manifest months later now in students who have also gained strength, focus, and skill in asana. More important, I learned something from Ana's skills as a healer. I think that reflects in the book title. As much of an intense physical practice Forrest yoga is, the power it has is in the power it has/she has to heal spiritually and physically.

Two. Ana and I are the same age. The other day I read the section about her first teacher training. She intended a month long intensive teacher training at age 18 and during that time detoxed from years of addiction to alcohol, drugs, and nicotine. At that age, I was attending my first year of college at the same time. She had already been through years of abuse and addiction and definitely had a harder life. I had been raised by supportive and loving, albeit insecure and somewhat addicitve parents. I did not have the experience of being unsupported or being forced to take care of myself. Years later at Kripalu, my insecurities were apparent through this training. I did have and did face some of my own harsh realities. And learned to make friends with them and use them as my best teachers.

This fierceness that I learned as a healing tool has allowed me to walk towards and with my truth in the past almost year. This has been a gift to me and I hope to my students. I am going to a class with Ana this Sunday so I can keep that connection I need to my own power.

MEANDERING MIND - DHARANA

This is not my first blog attempt. It is the third. My prior two attempts have been stunted due to lack of focus and concentration. This blog is about practice. My practice and anyone else's who wants to work on some of the deeper limbs. My chittis are so vritti that I struggle with even focusing them on writing but I have to shake them out somehow.

Also I am here to help others. Of course, I am a teacher. My practice comes first though and I keep finding ways to take it off the mat and out of the classroom. Here my focus will be the following:

My practice
Your practice
Information
Book reviews
Movies reviews
Recipes
Life and other stuff

Intention has to be manifested or it is just mindstuff. It is every day work. On the mat and off the mat. I know I took many hundreds of yoga classes with my hands in prayer offering an intention at the beginning of class and two breaths into Virabhadrasana I I am already thinking about my grocery list and the intention has already floated back into the subconscious.

So let us begin again. Practice. It is a practice.